Falls Beauty

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Tuesday, February 26, 2013

Her Laughter...

Christmas 2012

Sunday after church we drove to Mom and Dad's, picked them up, and met our son and daughter-in-love at Fats Asian Bistro in celebration of my birthday. While most of the feast was enjoyable, at one point Mom got mad. Dad poured more Jasmine tea into her cup. She didn't want more tea.

The incident silenced us.

Alzheimer's is ugly.

It changes a person's personality.

Not that Dad hasn't given Mom plenty to scuff about in their 63 years of marriage--it's the trivial irritations that rub her nerves, makes her lash out in uncharacteristic ways. But the moment passed. We finished our meal and all headed back to their place.

We're in the process of looking for a home to put Mom in, and praying it's a place where Dad will be comfortable too. A caregiver comes to their house a few times a week, but once Mom's in a care facility, the thought of him being home alone would cause us concern. His balance is bad and he falls.

Despite what appears to be a downer, the timing, well, it couldn't be better. Our kids are looking to purchase their first home and would love to buy Mom and Dad's. A big plus? It's close to us, our church, and the schools our son attended, and in a good area.

While our daughter-in-love has been to their home a few times, she's never seen the back rooms and the whole yard. So in an unobtrusive way, we showed her around.

After the tour, we visited a short time in the kitchen. Mom sat on a chair with her family standing around her. Three different times she threw her head back and laughed with childlike abandon. She's always loved to laugh. I'm thankful to have inherited that from her.

When Mom's gone, I want to remember that day. That vision of her head thrown back, and the childlike giggles pouring forth from her so sweetly. You couldn't help but join in her contagious gaiety.

Several years ago, she told me how Dad, upon hearing her laugh at something she saw on TV, asked, "Why do you laugh so much?" Her reply, "It's better than crying."

While my heart aches for the whole of who she was … I love her still and always will.

 

Proverbs 17:17 - "Friends love through all kinds of weather, and families stick together in all kinds of trouble." The Message

 
Abba, comfort us when life's changes come crashing down, and be our strength when we are weak. Thank you for being an ever present help in time of trouble, and for giving us joy in place of sorrow, in Jesus name, amen.

 
Love & Blessings ~ Danie

 
PS  I'm preparing for the Mount Hermon Christian Writers Conference and won't have time to blog for awhile. I'll see you soon sweet friends! Then again, I didn't think I'd find time to write today. So I'll simply follow God's lead. :)

18 comments:

  1. What a sweet post--you have a lot going on, Girlfriend. Praying for all of these transitions and peace upon your mom and dad.

    Blessings

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  2. Thank you sweet friend! I so appreciate your prayers.

    Love ~ Danie

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  3. Praying for you Danie Marie -- that your upcoming decisions are made with peace, knowing you've done your best for your parents. Have fun at Mt. Hermon. You'll have to give us an update.

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  4. Hi Vicki ~ Your post did come through, woohoo! Thanks much for stopping by, and for your sweet comments and prayer. I'll definitely give you an update in regards to Mt. Hermon. ;)

    Love ~ Danie

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  5. Hi Renee ~ Thank you so much, and you're most welcome!

    Love ~ Danie

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  6. Thanks for sharing your family with us, Danie Marie.
    Next time you visit your parents take a tape recorder so you can capture their voices and maybe a laugh or two.

    Have a great time at Mt. Herman. I look forward to hearing about that adventure.

    Write on!

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  7. Hi Danie, We had to put our mom in assisted living. She has dementia. God guided us just to the right place and she is with people who love her and care for her. No place is like your own home and with family--but God knows what they need. He is a kind heavenly Father as you well know. The Lord bless them and you.

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  8. Hi Carolyn, You're welcome sweet friend! Dad did a tape for me years ago about his life, I asked Mom, but she never did it. But I like your idea. Wish I'd had a recorder with me Sunday...

    Love ~ Danie

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  9. Hi Roxanne, Thank you. The Lord definitely knows. For now I have to place it all in His hands, because this afternoon, I spoke with Dad on the phone and he said he's not ready for a "home". *sigh* Did I mention he's stubborn?

    Love ~ Danie

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  10. My heart hurts for you and your parents. Alzheimer's is such a cruel disease. But the laughter is a great legacy.

    Wish I could be at Mt. Herman to meet you. Have a great time!

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  11. Hi Linda, Thanks for your sweet thoughts. Wish you could come to Mt. Hermon too!

    Love ~ Danie

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  12. I walked down the path you are walking with my mother. I pray blessings of peace and strength over you and your family. I'm glad you got your Mom's gift of laughter. There will be days ahead when all you can do is laugh. Thanks for sharing your story.

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  13. Cathy, you touched my heart. Thank you for praying! And I'm sorry that you had to walk this road. It helps knowing others understand.

    Love ~ Danie

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  14. You write with deep sensitivity. I'm absolutely thrilled to be in your critique group at Mount Hermon! Thank you so much for the kind words you emailed about me to the whole group. It meant so much! God's going to use you in a big way. Just keep yielded Him. Your words are in His hands!

    Big hugs; and I can't wait to deliver them in person!

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  15. Cheryl ~ I'm thrilled you stopped by. What sweet words. Can't wait to hug you back sister!

    Love ~ Danie

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  16. Oh, Danie, how well I know those moments. With having cared for my grandfather and my aunt during their Alzheimer's days here on earth, I know the mood swings, safety issues, and relationship conflicts it can cause. You're a precious daughter for wanting the best for them, even when it's hard.

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  17. Vonda, you are so sweet! Thank you for sending encouragment my way. I love you for it!

    Danie

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